Yesterday I had a really bad day. I felt like I couldn't stop crying. No one was there. I was completely alone. I think I needed that bad day though. I needed to grow, to know that I'm strong enough to fall and then get up by myself. I was completely broken down, I couldn't speak with anyone. I just couldn't. I wasn't me, I had to get together all the pieces and put them in the correct order.
So right now, I see the world in a different way. I'm not happy. I know I should, but somehow I can't. I have a house, money to buy food, I am studying far from my home-town, I have wonderful friends and my family loves me. I notice all that and I say thanks every day for that. I'm completely sure that my dream of making a new family will come true. I'm sure I will travel to China someday. I'm sure I will go volunteering to Africa.
I still have so many "what if?” But I made it. I passed that awful day; I just went to sleep and woke up this morning with more strength to face the day. Whatever it comes, I'm ready now.